This year, we consulted the Holiday Arma-BILL-o (you may have seen him on that episode of Friends, The One with the Holiday Armadillo) on how to deliver healthcare bills with a dose of holiday cheer! He had quite a few ideas for how to do this. While we had to politely advise against them, we’ll share his 5 most creative tactics for a more festive holiday healthcare billing experience.
1. Making a Statement with Confetti
Although a healthcare bill may not be on your wish list this holiday season, getting one in the mail shouldn’t be such a drag. The Holiday Arma-BILL-o suggested we put confetti or glitter in our mailed statements to add some festivity to the billing experience. In the words of Arma-BILL-o, “Bills are boring, but confetti signals a celebration!”
2. Preferred Payment Method? Unwanted Gift Cards
Have you ever received a gift card as a present and wished you could turn it into cash? I know I have (looking at you, untouched Subway gift card from 2012). Arma-BILL-o feels the same way. In fact, he thought it’d be a good idea for hospitals to accept those unwanted gift cards as payments. This might make the holiday healthcare billing experience a little easier for those patients with funds tied up in pesky plastic gift cards.
3. A Bill that Hits All the Right Notes
We’re willing to bet that most people would love to receive a singing holiday telegram, especially if it features Buddy the Elf! Similarly, Arma-BILL-o suggested we do this for healthcare bills. Imagine taking a musical approach to holiday healthcare billing. Patients could sing along with a chorus of easy-to-understand charge explanations and personalized payment options! While this was a great idea, we told Arma-BILL-o that it just wasn’t feasible given how many patients we have to reach.
4. Eggnog to Ease Cost Concerns
For patients with expensive healthcare bills, Arma-BILL-o requested that we deliver bills with a tall glass of eggnog. He figured high balances might be easier to stomach with a festive cocktail. While Patientco offers affordable payment options, like payment plans, some eggnog might help patients forget how much healthcare out-of-pocket costs have risen over the years. However, this idea posed several legal issues. We had to advise against this one, despite Arma-BILL-o’s disappointment.
5. Avoid Holiday Healthcare Bills by Getting on the Nice List
What if getting on Santa’s “nice list” meant you were safe from healthcare bills? This is what Arma-BILL-o proposed because it might make people treat others with more kindness. However, it’s not feasible for health systems and their operating margins. We told Arma-BILL-o that our patients will have to find other ways to reap the benefits of good karma.
Prevent Holiday Healthcare Billing Fails
Hopefully, you found some of these ideas entertaining! Fortunately, we were able to stop Arma-BILL-o from these holiday healthcare billing fails this year. Although, his heart was in a good place. Now, if only we could go back in time to stop the biggest holiday healthcare billing fail of all time: when Grandma got run over by a reindeer. Most people don’t know that she was actually walking to the mailbox to get a medical bill.
P.S. Patientco did not actually consider these ideas – this blog was written for fun, so no patients suffered from these holiday healthcare billing fails!